Coffee House Blues
by BlackDiceGambit
Summary: When Tweek has the misfortune of bumping into Craig and his classmates early one Saturday morning, chaos ensues as soon as Tweek discovers everyone is intoxicated and it's up to him to help out his crush and deny himself what he wants most.


Coffee House Blues

He shuffled through the tiny snow drifts that piled on the sidewalk, little white flakes resting on the toes of his shoes. His sweater was speckled with the snow that was still drifting down through the air. He sneezed as a rouge flake landed on the tip of his nose. He took the sleeve of his sweater and wiped his face. It was four a.m. on Saturday morning and he had to open his parents' coffee shop. He didn't know of any other teenager who would have to do this on a Saturday morning, but either way, it wasn't as though he would sleep in. He never slept. Ever.

Tweek walked through the heart of South Park along Main Street. All the lights were off in all the shops and it gave him such an eerie feeling. He hated it. No one was awake at four...well almost no one. Parading down the sidewalk at this ungodly hour were all of his classmates, obviously intoxicated.

"Oh Jesus Christ." He frowned and hesitated with the keys in his hand as he approached the coffee house door.

Craig stumbled along, Red curled against his side, the rest of the entire tenth grade class laughing and making their way towards him. Tweek swallowed hard and panicked. They hadn't seen him standing there yet. With trembling hands he managed to get the key into the bolt and pushed the front door open. He shut it behind him quickly and locked it. Slumping down behind the door he held his breath as their voices got louder. There was some brisk conversation, he heard his name and then there was pounding on the door. "Hey open up! You guys...you're suppose to...be open in fifteen minutes...c'mon...I bet you're in there!"

'Clyde.' Tweek thought as he recognized the voice.

"Awwh, fuck." Craig slurred.

"Heeey, Hey. Doe-doesn't like...um...what's his face...Tweek or whatever. Doesn't uhm..work Saturday mornings or whatever?" Red laughed, and Tweek heard a thud, as he assumed she fell against the door.

Tweek ran his hands through his hair, tugging hard. "Gah, what do I do, what do I do?" He cried under his breath, panic settling into his nerves causing him to shake more than normal.

"I need coffee with my booze. Let's just wait it out."

"Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!" He screamed falling over into fetal position tearing some of his blond hair right out.

"Did you hear that?"

"Nah, man. What?"

"Ugn. Nothing I guess."

Tweek scrambled quietly on his hands and knees behind the counter taking shelter. He could see them through the windows, but he was sure the street lamp behind them made it impossible for them to see inside.

Tweek had to open the store, but the last thing he wanted to do was see Craig...drunk...with Red.

He took deep breaths and stood up. He walked to the back of the store and flipped the lights on. There was some obnoxious cheering from outside the store.

"Jesus Christ." He frowned and started brewing coffees. He didn't have to unlock the door for another ten minutes anyway.

There was much rabbling coming from outside the doorway as Tweek set up. He put out a few of the bakery items on the counter before hesitantly walking towards the front door.

One minute until they were officially open.

Tweek flipped the deadbolt, his eyes carefully on the clock. As the deadbolt clicked, the door was shoved open and Tweek was roughly crammed between the door and the wall. He winced, the door hitting him square in the face as most of the kids in his class poured inside. Well everyone except him. He hadn't been invited.

Tweek slowly slipped from behind the door, rubbing his cheek as he pushed his way through his intoxicated classmates. He hoped they wouldn't vomit...he knew he'd be cleaning it up if they did.

"C-can I help you?" He muttered looking up at the line.

One by one he served them and pretty much, they all got plain coffee which was nice. He didn't have to make any lattes or anything.

Craig was towards the end of the line and look surprised to see Tweek there. "Hey! You didn't come out." He said with a frown, "No?"

Tweek shook his head. "...." He swallowed and looked down at the register as though something interesting were going on there. "...N-no."

"Oh...." Craig said with a long pause. "Why?" He added with a smile. He was so drunk.

"...It doesn't matter." He frowned glancing up at him looking harassed. Tweek didn't want to say he didn't get invited. Plus, Craig was shitfaced, there was no way he was going to remember this conversation anyway.

"Tweek...can I have a...a peppermint coffee?"

"Peppermint...coffee?"

"Mmmmmhhmmmmm." He said with a little smile.

Tweek paused and sighed. Turning around, he walked to one of the small cabinets and dropped down to his knees opening the door and rummaged through the napkins and coffee stirs. He bit his lip as he reached way back and felt around for a moment or two. "Ahh..." He huffed as he pulled out a bottle of peppermint syrup. "Yeah...I c-can do that f-for you."

Craig looked a little tired but nodded as Tweek poured him a medium cup and poured three teaspoons of syrup into his coffee. Tweek knew Craig took his coffee with regular milk and poured a splash till it was the color he normally liked. Tweek set it in front of him and pressed the paper cup into his hands.

"Thaaaanks, buddy." He chuckled and took a sip. "Per...fect. Ohh..oh, I have to pay you. Ho-"

"Don't w-worry about i-it." He smiled weakly.

Craig just nodded, taking another sip. Craig frowned, his skin paling at an alarming rate.

"Oh Jesus Christ." Tweek frowned as Craig collapsed onto the counter, puking all over it, and Tweek.

The blond's brows came together in concern and disgust....mostly concern.

Red was passed out on Clyde who was passed out in a chair, everyone else seemed too tired or drunk to care. Tweek, despite being covered in vomit ran around the counter to catch Craig's collapsing body. He was a heavy guy...all toned muscle and very tall too. Craig covered his mouth attempting to stop throwing up, but only managed vomiting into his hand...and all over the floor and himself. Tweek winced, it was pretty awful that no one was helping him.

He, with Craig helping, got him into the bathroom and over the toilet bowl. Craig seemed to vomit for what seemed like forever but Tweek stayed with him. He pulled off his apron and just threw it out, it was covered in bile anyway. He knelt beside Craig who was hunched over the toilet bowl. Tweek pushed back the dark strands of hair from his forehead and frowned. "I don't think the coffee tasted as good coming back up."

"....No...it did...really." Craig smiled a little, glancing up playfully.

He seemed to have sobered up a little since emptying his stomach of alcohol.

They sat there in silence for a few minutes after Craig wadded up some toilet paper to wipe his mouth. There was silence coming from the coffee house. Everyone was probably passed out. Tweek would wake them up in a minute. He started to get up now that Craig seemed to be feeling better. Craig grabbed his arm.

Tweek glanced over at him, as Craig turned to face him leaning down just a bit, Tweek frowned and backed up.

"Please don't kiss me..."

Craig frowned deeply, "But-"

Tweek flushed the toilet bowl full of Craig's vomit and stood up. "Yeah...n-not happening." He stood up to go get his crush a bottle of water and a coat that he hadn't puked on.


End file.
